31 August - not so screwed, but who took my damn plates?

It's a P&L, and on top of that, a P&L that is budgeted to barely break even..so I have no budget to buy nice things that make the eating venture more pleasurable...so I did what I always do, spend the money anyway and worry about it in the next life.
Got really cute presentation plates from Pier 1, 5 of them. Two were in use, and the rest were neatly stacked on top of the salad bar with a couple of other serving platters. When I walked out towards the salad bar to check the pans I notice 2 plates are missing. Naturally, I asked both cashiers if any customers came through their lines with really swank glass plates instead of the typical eco friendly paper we sport...and neither saw a thing. Makes me wonder how they know what to charge for the food if they don't bother to actually look at what is placed in front of them. "oh no, I didn't see them, they didn't come through my line, oh no".... Where, upon further inspection (I walked through the dining room looking at each table to see what the customers were eating on) sure enough, I find some precocious tot eating pancakes on my presentation plate. I hope I didn't freak the kid out too much when I grabbed the plate which only had the remaining smear of aunt jemima slicked across the gleam as proof my plate had been pilfered. "oh.." clueless mother of tot said "are these the wrong plates?" 'No, of course not" I wanted to reply..."I'd hoped someone would help themselves to my special presentation plates which were placed out of the line of sight and apart from every other eating aparatus so my plates wouldn't feel left out. You don't need college, you're smart enough!"

I'd give the entire day an 88 out of a hundred. The new staff was baptized with fire and all but one is going on to the next circle. Sadly, one, the part time , evening grill person is not cut out for this type of work. What I don't quite understand is how you can work in a kitchen in an elementary school and deal with a gaggle of precocious tots and their endless cantankering for chicken fingers and french fries ...know the job you accepted is clearly on a college campus, at the grill on a college campus..and not be able to deal with a gaggle of young americans and their endless cantankering for chicken fingers and fries. What's the difference other than a few pubic hairs and pimples??

Time to place another ad on Craig's List. I should have stock in the company, I spend so much time placing ads there.

My boss is coming tomorrow. This is why I say there is no god.

30 August 2009, Sunday

Just starting this thing today means you have no idea how I got to this point.....and since it's a 47 year and change calliope ride, how can I possibly hope to adequately bring you up to speed? Cutting to the chase, the cafes open tomorrow at the college. We've been on summer slumber mode since the last week in May...and bad habits have taken hold like mold on bleu. No one punches the time clock fully dressed and ready for work. No one has been wearing hats. The damn cell phones ring more than the bells of St. Mary's. The opening is not going to be easy for my staff....

There are two cafe's. One has a full kitchen, all production. The other is simply a grill and a quizno's (of all things, oh how horrid). Of the 15 staff members I have, 6 of them are new, 3 of them are fairly useless, one is only partly useless because he only works part time, and the rest put in an honest day's work.

For the record, I am the director of dining services. My previous appointments have been as executive chef on large college campuses or in corporate arenas. I know food, I can manage time better than Big Ben and I know what a kitchen can produce. I do not like the financial aspects of my job and with fervently that accounting fairies would come into my office in the wee hours of the night and do all my paperwork for me. I'd even leave delicious morsels as rewards if only they'd appear.

First staff members are in the house tomorrow at 6:30am. It's my plan to be there by 6. No, I will skip my daily torture event at the gym and go directly to work. I've spent 200 bucks on autumnal decorations (which my boss is going to skewer me like a kabob for). It's my plan to have both joints decorated before we open.

If there is a god, which I seriously doubt, actually, totally doubt, we'll get through all services tomorrow without over much rancor and with great aplomb. Patrons will sing our praises and the accounting fairies will pay me a visit.

I do not expect to sleep a wink tonight. If I do, I expect to have that recurring theme dream where it's christmas and I've neglected to wrap presents, or bake cookies or decorate the tree.... In short, it's the how screwed am I dream......